Kids require an enormous amount of equipment. You have all the gear for sleeping, feeding, transporting, dressing, cleaning and entertaining. Because kids grow so fast, once you are in the never-ending loop of kid stuff, you are kind of stuck in it until they are independent.
It begins with the baby shower. I don’t really know how long the baby shower tradition as we know it has been around, but it is all dumb in my opinion. The only part of the modern day baby shower that I think is genius, is the registering for gifts part and making the guests buy you things from this list. Honestly, without this guided list, my baby would have been born and I would not have had any of the necessary items needed for taking care of a baby. First of all I hate shopping and at that point in my life, I had never been around babies so I really didn’t understand all of the gear that would be needed. I was very fortunate. I got everything on my baby registry and then some.
And then the baby, (babies now), kept getting more stuff from well meaning family and friends, who are so lovely and just want to support and bring joy to these children, until the accumulation of kid stuff started taking over the house and one day, I woke up and it looked like a Toys r Us and a Gap Baby had exploded in my house. I was pretty good for a long time about keeping most kid things at bay, but then I had a second baby and now we have kid stuff in every room and it truly stresses me out. I am by no means a hoarder. The opposite in fact. I am constantly donating and getting rid of stuff and still, more stuff just appears.
I don’t think I had that much stuff growing up. No, I know that I didn't have that much stuff growing up. This is probably why I also don’t think that much stuff is necessary.
I am two kids in and the most useful items have been:
Honestly, the useless list can go on and on, but that's just me. I just don't like having that much stuff.
How do you keep the kid's stuff from taking over your house?
What items have you found to be the most useful? Which were the least useful?
Would love to hear from you!
The allure of a quinceañera for teenage girls is the stuff, the attention and the feeling of collective adoration from their family and friends. Is it an outdated tradition with misogynistic roots? Yes, completely. Will it ever go out of style? No, I don’t think so.
The quinceañera is not just a party or a debut into society for a young lady of marriageable age. It is an industry with lots of stakeholders comparable to the wedding industry. Because let’s be honest here, a quinceañera and a wedding have way more similarities than differences. And just like weddings, quinceañeras are here to stay.
People love a party and a quinceañera is a party on crack. There is church, a procession, pageantry, synchronized dancing, and of course, glamour and drama. It is the stuff that literally movies, documentaries, and TV shows are made of and have been made of.
For this week’s podcast we interview Jesse Garcia, the star of Quinceañera, the movie from 2006. This movie was released when I was working as a choreographer for a company called Sueños de Quinceañera. I did not have a quince. I had never even been to a quince before starting to choreograph for them. This job, this movie, and all of the subsequent shows like My Super Sweet Sixteen on MTV, were my indoctrination into an a segment of Latino teen life that I had not been aware of.
We talked with Jesse a little bit about quinceañeras, but mostly we talked about the movie. Enjoy!
Did you have a quinceañera?
Will your daughter(s) have one?
Would love to hear from you!
When I was pregnant for the first time the advice that I received the most was to get sleep because I was never going to sleep again. I was already a mom to two fur babies who woke me up constantly in the middle of the night so I didn’t really take this advice too seriously. And the thing is that no matter what advice you get, what books you read, what mother adjacent experience you may have had, nothing can prepare you for the realities of becoming a first time mom. It is just impossible to comprehend until you live it and see how your body, your mind and I dare say your soul, will react. It is an intense and difficult transition and it is all encompassing especially at the very beginning, so it isn’t until you kind of feel like you have the hang of it, that you can even recall who you were before you became a mom.
I am deep into motherhood. Almost 6 years and 2 kids later, and I am seeing the fog lift. I used to be someone totally different. I loved that person. I loved that life. I miss her sometimes. I’m on team hashtag no regrets over here because becoming a mother was all part of the plan, but hey, I’m only human. Of course I miss some of the things that I took for granted before having kids.
Here is a list in no particular order:
1. Real uninterrupted sleep and sleeping in till whenever I wanted on the weekends.
2. Loud crazy sex. I co-sleep and this is no longer an option unless I want to wake up and scare the baby…
3. Eating leisurely and not having to think about cooking various meals to accommodate the kid’s picky eating habits of the week.
4. Being able to be spontaneous. Freedom! Only answering to myself!
5. Going out to adult places and doing adult activities. I get to do this sometime, but not very much. We always have to accommodate the kids.
6. Watching adult TV and movies. Kiss anything rater R or PG-13 even goodbye. I didn’t sleep train so my kids are watching whatever I watch. I know, my bad.
7. Just being me and my husband in the house. The quiet, the solitude, the just-the-two-of-us-ness of it.
8. Being able to wear whatever I want and staying clean throughout the day. Kids are gross is all I’m saying.
9. Getting ready leisurely. I’m the last to get ready and by then I’m stressed and flustered.
10. Quiet time to binge read a book. Quiet in general. Oh, the constant talking sometimes kills me!
11. Being uninterrupted. I. Literally. Cannot. Finish. A. Sentence.
12. The luxury of only having to think about myself. This!
13. The luxury of wasting time. If I had only known then what I know now. Sigh.
Moral of the story is, life changes when you have a kid. (Duh) You will never know how it will change you for better or worse, until you experience it. Good luck out there first time mommas!
What are some of the things you miss from your pre-mom days?
Knowing what you know now, what advice would you give your pre-mom self?
Would love to hear from you!
Wendy writes blog posts that turn into conversations for the Mamá Cita Podcast.